The price to be a paying guest

Nobody told me this would be easy. In fact, nobody told me anything at all. The decision to go out and live alone was my own. It would have scared me before my exchange but I realise that this kind of life makes me happier than a pampered one.

Sure, I still have some training wheels. My family is one call away and life, with its washing machine and daily cleaners, is pretty luxurious. I do not fully live alone. Rather I share a house with three other youngsters who I do not run into much fortunately. I am well funded by my parents as well.

These training wheels do not take away the fact that I have had the greatest possible exposure to the real world as I can get (as an upper middle class boy). Anything more than this would probably require my , god forbid, parents’ demise. Boarding school was the first step in becoming independent. As much as I hated my father for it in the moment, I later caught on to his wisdom. Then came Finland, which again was something I almost canceled. These two were relatively safe environments.

And now I am in a foreign place again. I am running with the common people of Mumbai- something that I have always wanted to do. Yet it is much more difficult because I do not exactly fit in on my own. To be alone in another country does give you the benefit of the doubt when interacting with strangers. They are more empathetic and hospitable to foreigners. However, if I seem foreign in Mumbai there is a likelihood of getting scammed. Something worse than being left out because you did not know Finnish is being left out even though you know Hindi. Here the barrier isn't simply the language but the culture itself.

I've always have been able to choose my struggles- rather I have had the option of avoiding them. I could have gotten out of boarding school, out of Finland and out of this. But I believe that this is a way for me to learn the skills that would be required when that option is no longer present.

At first, I was worried about not getting the full exposure to a ‘bachelor’s life’ where each day is uncertain to a great extent. But I am getting the maximum amount luckily. I do not know where the next meal would come from or what I can do with my free time tomorrow. I have learnt to select clothes that are easier to wash and require little ironing. I find trouble in trimming my facial hair, maintaining my previous sense of fashion and the polish of my shoes.I am learning the commitment a long term struggle would require. In Finland I cooked once in a while and had a back up plan. Here, the backup plan would cost me. Part of me wishes to see how far I can stretch this by cutting off the supply of money from my parents and working part time to finance my daily expenses. Maybe I will do that. I was about to type ‘once I settle in’ but so far in life I am not quite intimate with the concept of settlement as one would imagine.

The challenges that come with freedom are much greater than what I have faced without freedom. Here I am, with the option to flunk my high school, to sleep all day, to read, to walk, to cook and what not. There is no schedule that binds me nor a family that oversteps its boundaries. This level of freedom is experienced by people growing into their twenties. I know 25 year olds who call their moms thrice a day.

In fact, one of the three tenants in this house is 25. He is the youngest after me.

As for me, I am eight years younger.